Today and in the weeks to come we’ll be delving into what should happen as we turn our efforts toward reconciliation. I’ll be addressing reconciliation from both the viewpoint of the offended and the offender (and yes, don’t exclude yourself from offender’s perspective! We’ve all been the offender in someone’s life at some point). Here are just some of the topics to come …
As the offender:
- How do I break through my own denial?
- How and when should I apologize? How many times should I apologize?
- What amends should I make and how far should I be willing to go with them?
- How do I maintain perspective and humility, so that I avoid reoffending?
- How do I live in a boundary-protected relationship?
As the offended:
- What should I require and expect of my offender?
- How and when should I accept an apology?
- What amends should I ask my offender to make?
- What boundaries do I need to set and how do I communicate them?
- How do I let go of the bitterness and trust my offender again?
- What are the signs that reconciliation is not going to work?
Before we really dive in though, I want to set the stage for a challenge that I’m proposing to you, as well as, to myself. Both offenders and the offended need this in order to fully forgive and ever hope to have a chance to reconcile …
“Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross!” –Philippians 2:5-8
I’ve prayerfully meditated on what I thought the name of this challenge should be for weeks, even months—since I thought about this idea as far back as December. I think this name captures what I feel God wants us to have …
I’ll be explaining what that’s all about and what part you can have in this challenge very soon!
For now, I want to give a shout out to a few posts/bloggers that I think are definitely worth checking out, if you haven’t already …
What part of the process of reconciliation is most confusing or fearful to you?
What prayer would you share with us today—asking for a humble heart like Christ’s?
Congrats to BlueCottonMemory, our winner of the ebook - That Works For Me. And thanks to all of you who participated and shared your knowledge. I’ve got a special surprise for you that you’ll receive in an email from me.
* To read the previous post in our ongoing series on forgiveness click – Does Forgiving Require Reconciliation?
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I do so love encouraging all of you and visiting your lovely places around the web, but I’ve found that I cannot get around to all who linkup each Wednesday—especially as the link-up grows. So I’ve decided to focus on visiting the blogs of those who are “early linkers” and on those who comment or connect with me in some way. So if you’d like for me to visit your blog, please join the link up early (typically between 9 and 9:30 p.m. CST on Tuesdays) or leave me a comment.