My husband and I have found that praying together is one of the most important things we do for our marriage. I’m not talking about praying at the dinner table or side-by-side at church or other church-related gatherings.
Those are all good things . . .
But I want to challenge you today to get out of your comfort zone by praying with your spouse at the start of each day.
When my spouse and I began this habit six years ago (yep, we didn’t pray together for 23 years out of our almost 30 year marriage!), it felt a bit awkward and maybe even forced. But over time it became our rhythm . . . our spiritual dance, if you will, that has kept us more in step with each and with God than ever before.
Why praying together is beneficial . . .
1. Creates a bond and intimacy.
I mentioned this earlier, but it bears repeating. If your marriage is growing cold, mundane or distant, this will certainly rev your hearts up for each other and for the Lord.
2. Helps to prevent conflict.
I’m not saying this will keep every argument at bay, but it really has changed the climate of my messy marriage—lessening those messes—because it refocuses our eyes on God all the while uniting us at the start of each day.
3. Invites God into your marriage.
I’m sure that many of you have your own time dedicated to God each day. That’s great for you, but there’s just something that I believe God loves and blesses when we come together with our spouses in His name.
“For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” ~Matthew 18:20
Now on to a few cautions . . .
1. Don’t pressure a spouse who isn’t spiritually ready or open to pray with you.
This is especially true if your mate is an unbeliever. Instead, pray for your unbelieving or spiritually hesitant spouse daily, but never try to push “praying together” on him or her. It will only create resistance and resentment where you certainly do not want it.
2. Don’t expect immediate results.
Consistency and commitment to this practice will bear great fruit in time. But like any fruit bearing tree, it takes time.
3. Don’t get frustrated if you’re the one who always seems to initiate.
If your spouse was willing to do this from the start but is not as mindful of the habit, accept that this might just be “your” role. After all, it is a worthy role and calling—to be the initiator of prayer in your marriage! As long as your mate seems willing, then leave well enough alone!
3 easy steps for praying together . . .
1. Agree on a time together.
My husband and I always like starting our day this way, but if your job(s) won’t allow for this, then choose another optimum time. If your spouse travels out of town a lot, consider using Skype, Facetime or simply calling each other at an agreed upon time.
2. Hold hands.
You might feel like this is too awkward and intimate for your first time out, but I’d say fight that hesitancy. Praying together must feel like a joint effort—like dancing—and holding hands aids in that pursuit. If your mate balks at this, then respect his or her wishes, but at least suggest it at the outset.
3. Each spouse should pray a simple sentence or two.
Don’t feel the need to pray “around the world and back” or in a way that comes across as “super-spiritual”—especially as you begin this practice. Your mate may feel intimidated by how well you pray or simply won’t want to spend that much time in prayer when s/he is in a hurry to head to work. Just remember to always leave your spouse feeling encouraged and respected.
Here’s an example of what I pray each day, “Father, help us to make time for You and let that influence our hearts—living out Your truths in key moments today.”
Get the idea? I hope so!
What is one reason you haven’t made praying with your spouse a priority and habit?
If you do pray daily with your mate, what positives have you seen God produce out of it?
Here are some lovely linkups I join – Christian Blogger Community, Mondays @ Soul Survival, Testimony Tuesday, Coffee and Conversation, Coffee for Your Heart, Sitting Among Friends, Moments of Hope, Literary Musing Mondays, Fresh Market Friday, and DanceWithJesusFriday
Let’s Get this ‘From Messes to Messages’ Linkup Started!
Add any links that are uplifting, helpful and encouraging to our spiritual lives, marriages and families! Be sure to add a link on your blog back to “From Messes to Messages” or Messy Marriage as well. For linkup guidelines/button, click here.