My Marriage Mess
Early in my marriage, my husband and I knew that with each passing day, we were making a bigger and bigger mess of our marriage. We were young, and perhaps naive enough to not know how to change it.
Since we were both Christians who were active in our church and growing in our faith, we were confused about why we were struggling so much. So we decided at some point to seek out a marriage counselor.
Through those counseling sessions, God began to pull back the layers of our marriage, revealing to us not just the mess we had in our marriage, but also the mess we had in our heads and hearts. We somehow believed that it was our spouse’s fault for the mess we were in!
It wasn’t until we were able to admit our own contribution to the mess of our marriage and humbly surrender that mess to God, that He was finally able to do His redeeming and renewing work in our marriage.
We are still a work in progress. But I have to say, God has brought us so far from those dark and messy early days. Now our marriage perspective is not based upon what we can get from each other or whose at fault for the latest mess.
We’ve learned how to forgive one another and accept one another as the broken, sinful partners we are. And we’ve learned to surrender our messes daily to the only One who can enable us to love each other as He loves us … with a Big, God-Sized Love!
I have a Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Counseling and have counseled women and married couples for over 25 years. I’m also actively involved in leading the women’s recovery groups in our church, where my husband is Pastor of Care and Recovery.
I received my certification as a Board Certified Christian Life Coach through American Association of Christian Counselors in the Spring of 2012. You can find out more about my life-coaching services by clicking here – Hope Renewed.
My husband, Gary and I have been married for 28 years and counting! We have three handsome sons, Jordan, Graham and Braden, as well as, our newest family member, Sarah, Jordan’s new wife and our “daughter-in-love!” I just love living this messy life with all of them and especially with the One who redeems all of our many messes—Christ!